God is my Honor - Psalm 62
Finding rest in Him alone has been working for me. As I’ve written these articles over the last few weeks, God has taken that exhausted Sarah and filled me with Him. I am much more rested (yes, following my own realizations and getting more sleep), but also simply mind-rested. I feel ready to move forward and not just stop to collect myself. I thought I would push through this month with fluff, short articles and that is it. Instead, God has met me here and truly provided rest.
I had to find that verse, the one that says that God is my rest. I can’t believe that I didn’t find it earlier in looking for background on this month’s topic! Psalm 62 is the one. He is my fortress, my rock, and my salvation, I will not be shaken (verse 6). These descriptions of God I knew, I know. There was another that caught my attention, though: My salvation and my honor depend on God (verse 7). There was a footnote that says also ‘God Most High is my salvation and my honor’.
God is my honor
It occurred to me that the hurry and hustle is the response to our wanting honor. We want the esteem of others around us. We look around and compare ourselves, our work to those who apparently do more or better we do. So, we hurry to do more, accomplish more, and take our focus off of Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith. But we can consider more on comparisons later. This honor bit is what is still yelling out for attention.
God is the one who bestows honor upon me. He does not wish to see me dishonored, disgraced, embarrassed, humiliated, or discredited. He doesn’t want that for us. We are His beloved. You are His beloved whom he has taken from the pit and washed clean. The last thing he wants is for the ball to drop and splatter all over us (the ball, ie: whatever we are worried about or trying to achieve, repair, keep whole). When we hurry about and listen to that drive to accomplish or finish or do and do and do, we have taken the ball from Jesus and are holding it ourselves. He wants us to be with Him, in His refuge. Instead we rush about getting things done, we carry the ball. Because no one else will, because somebody’s got to do it, because no one does it like me. God is my honor. God is my good name and my esteem. We, Jesus and I together, do a much better job that I ever could by myself.
Carrying the ball
Has He told me to pick up the ball? Has He said that this is ours to carry together? Has He made this my priority or am I trying to make the best of something that I see falling apart? That is our limitation, making the best of something. God can restore: He can give us back what we have lost, He can carry the ball for us and give us His honor. Even if we feel the shame of our past or the embarrassment of not measuring up, He can restore that loss, He can restore the pride and esteem. He lifts up the downtrodden, He gives meaning to the lost, He provides for the disgraced. He is the only one who can restore these things, re-establish them as before or even as we never imagined.
In Luke 15:11-32, the prodigal humiliated and was humiliated. He offended, squandered and was prideful and selfish. We too have likely done things we are not proud of, or perhaps have found ourselves in situations we never intended. We lose jobs, we end up divorced, we mismanage finances, we disappoint our family, we find ourselves without honor. We don’t want to hold our head up high; we keep it low aimed at our next step, hurrying to get it all done. Maybe no one will notice… Jesus noticed and waits with open arms. His arms are big enough to hug you and hold you tight and big enough for all the balls you are carrying and big enough to take our problems and shame and all the rest of our muck and turn it into beauty. He makes beauty from ashes.
Or maybe you are rolling your eyes and saying that your life is not such drama. You just hurry to get things done, but don’t have a life in shambles. But you see, the hurry is the symptom of what is to come. We all have to hand the balls to him, not carry them or juggle them in the air. We all have to lay down the drive for our own honor and instead wrap ourselves in Christ. He doesn’t intend for us to carry the burdens alone. Verse 8 of Psalm 62 implores us to trust in Him and pour out our hearts. That seems to be the conclusion I have drawn as well – it is the full trust of Christ that provides rest. I do trust Him to carry that ball so much better than I can.
Back to comparisons
Our esteem is easily measured by looking around at others. But that can drive us to feel less esteem if someone ‘is doing better than me’ and can enhance our esteem when others ‘are lost.’ The thing about comparing is that we will find our vision is distorted. Our eyes do not have the filter of Christ who is our only comparison. He is the one who gives me meaning, He is the one who defines my identity. He is the one. All others who evaluate, judge, compare, will have an inaccurate opinion. Including myself. He knows all of me, so really the comparisons are just more of a push toward the character that I am trying to leave behind. In 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, as Paul talks about the race that we are to win, there is only one winner and I cannot run another’s race, let alone win it. I can only win the race that I am registered for, and Christ signed me up for my own race, my race to become like Him. It is not a race to speed through, but the long run, paced well to not cause exhaustion. A pace where I find rest in Him.
