I’ve been hard at work trying to understand self-control, controlling myself: actions, words, thoughts. I listed also as topics to study specifically, anger and passions. As I began to consider anger, I was having some difficulty understanding how we control anger, a feeling. I think we are generally taught that emotions are not bad, it is what we do with those emotions that are bad. What I am beginning to see then is that we have a cultural belief that actions can be controlled, but emotions not. This would be like saying that it was acceptable to hate your mother-in-law as long as you don’t act on it. Yet, as Christians, we know that would be the equivalent of murdering in our hearts, as Jesus describes in Matthew 5:21-22. We are called to take the ‘non-action’ a step further to controlling the feelings as well.

Instead, what we have from God is that our hearts matter very much therefore, the emotions that reside there must be controlled, or trained. Believe me, I have always embraced feeling every one of my emotions, and frequently leading to much trouble for myself. I am wondering what has taken me so long to understand the possibility of training them and at the same time a bit overwhelmed with the doing. It is only when I recall the Spirit has given us self-discipline to have the appropriate response (2 Timothy 1:7) that I put away the sense of being woefully inadequate at controlling my emotions. And it is a true statement that I am woefully ill-equipped to control my emotions; only with the cooperation (the co-operation) of the Spirit will we succeed.

We are enabled to dominate our emotions

Let us take heart in the numerous verses that tell us when or how to express or dominate our emotions: fear (Luke 12:4-5, Psalm 34:4, Isaiah 41:10), anxiety (Philippians 4:6, Matthew 6:25-34, Proverbs 12:25), joy (Philippians 4:4), hate (Ephesians 4:26-31, Proverbs 8:13, Leviticus 19:17-18), envy (Proverbs 14:30, Galatians 5:26), gladness (Psalm 32:11). There are too many to continue listing them, but here is certainly enough evidence to admit this is not only do-able, but part of God’s good plan for us as His followers.

Inherently, none of the verses say that we should not feel these emotions. The difference between biblical training and cultural understanding is the way that we either embrace them or let them dominate our mind. As Christians should we be so angry that we ‘see red’ or so out of touch that our ‘head is in the clouds’? Neither extreme seems right, but rather to be put under training with the Spirit we can prudently express ourselves.

Godly living

Romans 6:17 says, ‘you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teaching that has now claimed your allegiance,’ and indicates then a pattern of teaching that the heart obeys. As Jesus described in Matthew 5, our heart is important in our living godly lives; and here we see that our heart will also develop patterns when taught. So, it is the teaching itself that we must consider to fully get our emotions under control and come to spiritual maturity.

In 2 Peter 1, we find an astonishingly short passage that answers everything necessary to obtain this elusive control over emotions and growth toward spiritual maturity. Peter calls it ‘participating in the divine nature.’ Verses 3-4 (ESV) say, ‘His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of him who called us to his own glory and excellence, by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.’

Power of God in us

When I read these verses, I picture myself as a house, with the electricity wired in and the power transformer is God, likely the Holy Spirit. The more we turn to Him, knowing him through the word and prayer, the more the power runs in to light us up and fill us with his divine nature. Choosing him rather than the worldly things that surround us scours out the rust or corrosion that may be in the wires and lights up the dark corners of our lives. The more switches turned on in the house, the more his power fills us.

The passage continues with encouragement to furnish this house, which is our lives. ‘Make every effort to supplement your faith,’ verse 5-7 exhorts us to ‘supplement’ our faith, which can also translate as ‘furnish’ or ‘richly supply’ our faith with virtue, knowledge, self-control, steadfastness, godliness, brotherly affection, and love. We must pay attention to the other things that we bring into the house, into our lives. The world will seek to show us many things which detract from God’s purpose and design for us, however earnestly seeking Him will always bring us rich supply of all he has to give.  

Control emotions through the power of the Spirit

Peter begins by saying that we already hold the divine power for everything we need to live in a godly manner. We already possess everything needed to control our emotions (and reactions and actions!). These verses give us a road map to bringing our emotions under self-control. Growing in the knowledge of God and applying ourselves to supplementing our faith will allow the Spirit to work more and more in us, turning our worldly out-of-control responses to emotions into godly management of emotions (2 Peter 1:8). This road map idea is helpful also in knowing that his is journey, not an overnight miracle. I do know a man whose character was strongly tempered within a short time of knowing Christ and accepting him as Lord. It is encouraging to know that it is possible. Unleashing the power of the Spirit who is already within us, is done in choices we make daily. This is an experience of power, not just knowledge of God that Peter exhorts us toward.

Control implies a certain tension. There need to be opposing forces to require any kind of control. I’m beginning to embrace the tension and walk the challenge. I am only starting my walk in the control of my emotions (I honestly didn’t want to or think it possible before), but I am certain that increasing in knowledge of God, specifically how he sees me, will lead to a better me. A more spiritually mature, Christ-like me.