We began with the story of Adam and Eve being given a choice in the garden and they failed to trust that God was doing everything for their good. They ate fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, opening our eyes to the evil we did not know before. We know the story well. The consequence was opening of eyes, the cause was the lack of trust that God loved them and was doing only good for them. He never tried to control Adam and Eve, He only loved them. That was also what Jesus came to do - love us and show us God’s love for us. We continue to have this pull toward control, but God’s only answer has been love. Maybe that is our answer too. Maybe love is the answer to control.

Love, an overused word

We love our Starbucks, we love our car, we love our family, we love that song. ‘Love’ is a bit overused these days. Love has lost its godliness by being used to describe our favorite things. I’m guilty of it too, but the more I think about love, the more I think that we have to follow the example of Jesus: love our enemies and neighbors and each other and ourselves and God. That doesn’t leave a ton of room for coffee, cars, and music; it is all about the living. How do we go about living out this love for the living when we don’t even say the word as Jesus did, with the same intention and the same purpose, the purpose to show us that we are loved and, indeed, His beloved.

My struggle is how to love when I want people to do certain things. My struggle is how to love when I am frustrated by my circumstances or making no progress in my goals. My struggle is how to love when my plans have gone awry. But I return to the thought that love is an action and not an emotion. Emotions change over time but love never fails. Love is manifest in our actions, as described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8: patient, kind, does not envy, does not boast, is not proud (I should stop here and get to work, because I fail all the time at just the opening five!), does not dishonor others, is not self-seeking, not easily angered, keeps no record of wrong, does not delight in evil, rejoices with truth, always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres, never fails.

How Jesus loved

I think this passage describes the basis for all relationships, but there is more to consider depending on the specific relationship. Jesus did all these, but he also taught, demonstrated (set an example), corrected, attended to other’s needs, developed relationships, and I am sure there are other things he did as part of the relationship he had as an expression of love. In the Garden of Eden, God made garments for Adam and Eve, providing for their needs other than having instructed them and developed relationships with them. Jesus instructed out of love, to ensure that those he loved grew more like Him, grew closer to Father. He washed feet (for example), he demonstrated to us what it looks like to love so we could apply the instruction, becoming apprentices of love and maturing into loving well. He corrected (Peter and Martha) so we could combine our learning and work it out to manifest the same love he showers upon us. He acted in love by responding to needs (miracles) as we too should meet the needs of others whenever possible, even just walking down the street.

Becoming an apprentice of love

When our neighbor builds a fence between us and it is a foot over on my side of the property, I have to go beyond being patient and kind, and controlling my anger. I have to pull out some of the tools that Jesus used; I’ve got to perhaps instruct my neighbor (kindly and gently), without dishonoring them. Hopefully, I’ve already got a relationship with them…and it is good! It isn’t easy, the emotions may cloud our judgement, but they can be controlled (see previous posts here and here).

‘By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another,’ (John 13:35); the way we love people, the how and the if, is what makes a difference. Checking the verse, I was surprised to see the ‘if’ in the verse, ‘if you love one another’. There is a choice, again it is not an emotion to love one another, it is a choice to act in love. And it is not only between fellow believers but the way we love strangers and enemies, God and friends, aunts and cousins, children and adults. Let us love well, following Christ’s example and the foundation verses in 1 Corinthians 13.